Archive for the ‘Miscellaneous Musings’ Category

Computers are evil!  When they work, they are the greatest machines ever created.  However, they have this tendency to “corrupt” over time.  I think it might be a conspiracy by the computer manufacturers to keep you coming back for more.


I’m on my computer a lot – I work from it, obviously, as a freelance writer.  I research information and I spend a fair amount of time just surfing the ‘net.  So, like anything that gets continued use, it’s bound to slowly deplete of energy.  But what a pain in my arse when it does.

Luckily, I have backup.  The lovely mini-computer that I’m typing on now (AKA my laptop).  As convenient as it is, I want a working PC.  I’ve run dozen of tests and applied even more “fixes.”  So why, can I ask, isn’t my computer fixed? 

As much as it pains me to say, I think it might be time for a new computer.  It’s not the money aspect that bothers me (although it probably should), it’s the transfer of everything to a new computer so that it’s just like the one I currently have, minus all the problems.  So, I will continue for a short while in my denial, trying to fix a machine that is probably inevitably broken, and use my backup supply when the preferred method does not work to the best of its ability.  Then, I will probably purchase another blessed, yet evil, machine.


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When I was reading earlier today, I read a line that stuck with me regarding change.  The general meaning was this:

The more you change, the less of you there is.

Being the ponderer that I am, I thought about this line for quite awhile.  Is it true?  I’ve heard quotes like “The more things change, the more they stay the same” which, in all honesty, never made much sense to me.  If they change, they’re not the same, right?  But this line in a book, one that probably was not meant to provoke as much thought as it did, left me thinking.

If you read my “What I’ve Learned From 2007” post, you will see I have undergone a great deal of change in the last year.  Even before 2007, I was in constant fluxuation.  I finished grad school, moved halfway across the country, got a new job.  That was all in the 2nd half of 2006.  Then 2007 brings a marriage, a diagnosis of a chronic disease (that sounds so menacing every time I say it!), and other various life-altering changes.  Already in 2008, I’ve transitioned from being a full-time therapist to a full-time freelance writer, a huge change in and of itself.

So, with the last 2 years of my life being as they’ve been, who am I?  Am I that person that sat in class at her university several days a week?  Or the person that shared insights over coffee and cigarettes in cafes with her college friends?  How about that single mom that raised a child through years of schooling and strife?  Am I her?

I would like to think I am a composite of all I ever was – that each day adds a piece of the puzzle called “Angela’s Life” that will only be complete on the day I take my last breath.  All of my current decisions are based on my past successes and failures.  Regret is not in my regular vocabulary, as I made the decision to do everything I’ve ever done, and each choice has made me who I am. 

So in regards to the above words from the book I am reading, and the question I posed about it, in my opinion, no, it is not true.  In my opinion, if it were, we would be composed of random days stuck together with no rhyme or reason.  As for me, I want my life to have both rhyme and reason.

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As I perused the headlines via CNN.com, I was visually informed that one of my most favorite “boy bands” of the 1980s is reuniting for a tour.  New Kids on the Block – or NKOTB depending on which part of their singing career you followed them in, has just announced the reunion.

I was brought back to my younger years when I would have given my allowance for a year to attend a New Kids concert.  To see Joey McEntyre in person would have been (or so I thought at the time) the most important thing to happen in my life.  But, given that I was provided with overprotective parents who did not put concert-attendance on the list of “safe” things for their daughter to do, I was left to sing their swooning ballads and upbeat pop lyrics either in the solitary comfort of my bedroom, or with friends. 

Yet, for some reason, I do not find myself getting excited over this newsflash.  In fact, I’m slightly annoyed by it and here is my reason:  Donnie Wahlberg, although not as prominent as his brother Mark (or Marky Mark, if you knew him in this role), has, to some degree, established himself as a decent actor.  To revert to the pop star, boy band image is disturbing to me.  I guess for the other ones, it may be serving a midlife crisis need they have to return to the limelight.  However, I simply do not see this turning into a successful venture.  Those that listened to them in their prime (like me) have moved on, and anyone else may just become confused at their presentation.

Alas, I shall not judge until I hear it (yes, I said hear it, because I will not be spending my hard-earned freelance income on an NKOTB concert ticket) for myself.  Who knows, the style may have changed into something my grown up ears can enjoy.

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Today I transitioned my old blog into my new blog with WordPress, so I thought I should post in order to “break in” the new one.  One topic that has been on my mind lately is loyalty in the work place.  I’m curious how many people out there work for a job in which the loyalty goes both ways.  Many people would probably like to think this is the case.  I mean, who could purport possessing sanity AND stay in an occupation in which they feel they could easily get canned going into work the next day for no reason?  It gives us a sense of security to think that the loyalty we put into our job is also returned at the same, or at least at a relatively comparable, level.

But how do we know this?  Have we been put in any situation at the workplace to prove this, well, hope that we have?  Have our employers proven this to us in order to legitimize the sureity we have?  Or does an employer even have an obligation to prove this to us?

I’ve found over the years in the workforce that employers do not seem to have a great deal of loyalty in return for the hard work that has been put in on an employee’s part.  It seems like a very unbalanced system, the relationship between employee and employer.  As I watch around me, people are laid off, there’s a “reduction in positions,” etc.  My friend just informed me the other day that her husband, who has put in well over 13+ years at his job, has gone from making close to $30 an hour to around $14, due to the employer filing bankruptcy.  I guess some money is better than none, but how is this a fair trade for the loyalty he’s given them?

But what obligations, if any, do employers even have?  Or is it comparable to the parent who says “Do as I say, not as I do?”  Just like this sort of faulty parenting has a high failure rate, so does the company that chooses to adopt such faulty business practices. 

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So, I’m sitting at my computer, minding my own business, when I suddenly get a pop up screen letting me know that my friend from years past would like to add me to his Yahoo friend list. First, let me say, that was a blast from my past! I have not talked to this guy in probably 3-4 years.

He belonged to a group of friends I hung out with at my Community College. He’s also part of a “subcategory” of those friends who are from Canada…my Canucks, as I used to call them. I loved these guys! They were fun, and I had a blast when we hung out.

But, as I grew and entered the world of “University,” my Community College friends drifted away into a new category…Old Friends. I went from always hanging out with them, to rarely talking, to now, when I’m overloaded with memories of my old friends and that chapter of my life.

But what do you say to old friends? Hi, how the hell are ya? (Did that). What have you been up to? (Please fill me in on the last 4 years of your life). It just makes me think how life is full of chapters. Chapter 1 – Birth…and on and on it goes, filling up with old friends and new friends who might eventually be classified as old friends.

But, written in this chapter of my life is the day where my “old friend” IM’d me, and now I must catch up, as much as one can through a little box on the screen, with one of my Canucks.

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Sometimes it amazes me how people try to do the same things over and over whether those things are working or not. And then, they have the nerve to complain when life is not going the way they want it to go! Einstein stated it perfectly – “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” Much could be learned from this man.

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Well, this season definitely hasn’t been a keeper for the Niner’s. Thankfully, I’m not a fair-weather fan, so I will be with them again next year, hoping for the best. I hold on to games like last week where they just seem to be on target both offensively and defensively. As I’m sure many fans are thinking…”If only they could play like that every game.” But, I will continue to don my pink #21 Frank Gore jersey each game, silently wondering if I’m bringing bad omens instead of good luck with my apparel, but hoping that the positive thoughts I’m sending through my big screen tv will get through to the whole team, not just one or two players who decide to do their best that evening. Hopefully Tampa Bay will be easy on us, or we’ll be rough on them, however you choose to look at it. With the season officially over in two games, I’d like to think we could at least clinch a win of six this season. Go Niners!

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